Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Single's Awareness Day





As much as I hate to admit it, Valentine's Day is fast approaching. I made the mistake of walking into Walmart yesterday and my eyes were immediately assaulted by a bright pink and red banner announcing the upcoming arrival of this terrible holiday. A few paces later, I was attacked again - this time by rows full of heart shaped boxes filled with chocolates and dozens of pink, red, and white stuffed animals.
Now, you may be wondering, "Stephannie! How can you hate a holiday that is all about love?" Well, let me tell you - it is quite easy.

Stephannie's Scientific List of Why Valentine's Day Sucks

1. Pink is awful.
2. It grosses me out to watch people cuddle and there seems to be infinitely more of it occuring on Valentine's day.
3. Many babies are created on this day. And you all know how I feel about babies.
4. I can't wear my favorite pair of earrings because they're heart-shaped and I don't want anyone to mistakenly think I'm celebrating Valentine's Day.
5. I am forced to watch girls carry around roses, oversized stuffed animals, and chocolates.
6. None of those gifts are ever for me. Unless of course, they're from my dad. Or I send them to myself.
7. I'm single.

However, there is one thing I do love about Valentine's Day. My friends and I usually have an anti-Valentine's day party - a party which is usually filled with all sorts of dessert, as well as my favorite activity: boy stalking.

1 comment:

  1. We're gonna be throwing an epic beyond anything we've ever imagined before party this year :)

    ReplyDelete